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Old 11-05-2006, 11:45:09 AM     #1 (permalink)
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If football clubs were women

usual forwarded email thing, but this one was class

Fulham = Charlotte Church
Proof that money can't buy you class but could look more attractive if the Welsh bloke was given the elbow.
Birmingham = Pamela Anderson
Used to look good in the cups but now a declining force. Plus millions of people watched them get a good seeing to.
Wigan = Davina McCall
Poor attendances confirm they've been promoted above their ability.
Portsmouth = Girls Aloud
Only one real class act among the hastily assembled line-up. You shouldn't like them but admit it, you've sneaked the occasional admiring glance.
Sunderland = Kerry Katona
Once the people's favourite but now an embarrassment. Fun while it lasted - now disappear from where you came, please.
Spurs = Keira Knightley
Undeniably easy on the eye with an attractive English spine and proof that two little ones up front needn't be a drawback.
Everton = Dannii Minogue
The poor relation to the more glamorous sibling. Can anyone remember when it was they were supposed to be any good?
Arsenal = Jordan
Were more likeable when they weren't packed out with expensive foreign implants.
Newcastle = Jodie Marsh
Impressive front two but embarrassing at the back. Had surgery but need a lot more work to compete at a higher level.
Aston Villa = Dido
Bland, boring and still trading off the one big hit they had years ago.
Liverpool = Sophie Ellis-Bextor
Individually all the components look great but stick them together and it just doesn't work.
Chelsea = Rachel Stevens
You'd rather just watch them than listen to all that painful whining.
West Ham = Vicky Pollard
Nothing more needs saying as a teams fans speak for themselves - Chavs in Chavs clothing.
Bolton = Clare Balding
You wouldn't. Not even if they were the last team on earth.
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Old 11-05-2006, 12:45:44 PM     #2 (permalink)

 
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That one actually made me laugh, I wonder who Wimbledon FC would be? Probably some pornstar as she's always going down.
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Old 11-05-2006, 07:38:54 PM     #3 (permalink)
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Yeah some of the junk I get blimey.

The spam is that clever some of it says things like..

Dear Sean

She wants your *****

I am always being acqused of sleeping around by the misses.
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Old 11-05-2006, 09:49:08 PM     #4 (permalink)
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here is one

-----Original Message-----
From: Wilton Couch [mailto:Loaf72@linuxmail.org]
Sent: 11 May 2006 18:17
To: sean@domainbrand.co.uk
Subject: white panties Wilton Couch

Hi, Dear sean!

panty hose pics
>> http://geocities.com/aggdggXDf8b

Your Wilton
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Old 12-05-2006, 12:19:26 AM     #5 (permalink)

 
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Cheeky sod. I'd horse whip you, if I had a horse.
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Old 12-05-2006, 12:31:05 AM     #6 (permalink)
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as my lot have said before...

Quote:
If football clubs were women, the board of directors would be in court for rape.
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Old 12-05-2006, 01:49:38 AM     #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by singlefile
Cheeky sod. I'd horse whip you, if I had a horse.
Lovely
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