We're back in primary school again for this joke. Okay. Teacher asks class: "Now children, we're going to start looking at some grown-up words. Can anyone tell me what 'contagious' means?" Little Becky. Hand up. "Please Miss, my brother had a cold and he passed it on to me. That's what contagious means." Teacher: "Excellent Becky!" Little Davey: "Please Miss, my brother had chicken pox and I caught it very quickly because it's very contagious." Teacher: "First class answer Davey." Little Paddy at the back: "Please Miss, I know what it means." Teacher: "Come now Patrick, are you sure?" Paddy: "Yez muss. Me faather told me that Seamus next door was painting his house with a 2-inch paintbrush." Teacher: "Well, Patrick?" Paddy: "Well muss, he said it was goin to teek the contagious."