Membership is FREE – with unlimited access to all features, tools, and discussions. Premium accounts get benefits like banner ads and newsletter exposure. ✅ Signature links are now free for all. 🚫 No AI-generated (LLM) posts allowed. Share your own thoughts and experience — accounts may be terminated for violations.

Humour

Status
Not open for further replies.
Joined
Aug 27, 2006
Posts
505
Reaction score
15
Following the tragic death of the Human Cannonball at the Kent Show, a spokesman said “We’ll struggle to get another man of the same calibre.”

Just been to the gym. They’ve got a new machine in. Only used it for half an hour as I started to feel sick. It’s great though. It does everything – KitKats, Mars bars, Snickers, Crisps, the lot.

My new wig arrived the other day. It’s made of a*sehole hair. The bloody thing keeps blowing off.

Question – are there too many immigrants in Britain? 17% said yes; 11% said No; 72% said “I am not understanding the question please.”

Prince William says he doesn’t want the traditional fruit cake at his wedding. Prince Phillip says he doesn’t give a toss, he’s still going.

100 people from Liverpool were asked today if they thought Britain should change its currency. 98% said no, they were happy with the Giro.

I’ve just watched the Simpsons and realised it’s a load of boll*cks. Who would put a load of funny yellow people in charge of running a nuclear power station?

Now he’s dead, they’re making a film of Eddie Stobart’s life story. I’ve just seen the trailer.

Now Eddie Stobart’s dead they’ve found out that he was HGV positive.

I thought the wife would be the ideal candidate for a new TV show. Turns out I got it all wrong and the programme’s called Fact Hunt.
 
These gave us a great laugh here in our office - thanks!
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Rule #1: Be Respectful

Do not insult any other member. Be polite and do business. Thank you!

Members online

Premium Members

New Threads

Domain Forum Friends

Lastest Listings

Our Mods' Businesses

*the exceptional businesses of our esteemed moderators
General chit-chat
Help Users
  • No one is chatting at the moment.
  • Siusaidh AcornBot:
    Siusaidh has left the room.
      Siusaidh AcornBot: Siusaidh has left the room.
      Top Bottom